Be a Friend!

" Proverbs 27:17 “Iron sharpens iron, so does a man’s wise counsel sharpen the countenance of his friend.”

I am a recovering co-dependent rescuer. What that means in simple terms is that for many years I felt worthless unless I could help someone in trouble. I went so far as to seek out people who I thought needed help, even though they didn’t. By limiting my help only to friends, I brought a lot of frustration and pain into my life.

After receiving professional counseling, I realized that the previous experiences and habits gave me no real joy, but rather a false sense of accomplishment. For me, friends were people I could use to make me feel better. Having grown up in a Christian setting where what you do gets you to heaven, I was driven to help everyone I could. Part of the counseling process was to help me realize how wrong that was and how important God’s grace is for my life.

It’s interesting how during those years I had many acquaintances, but few real friends. The verse above in Proverbs 27 had never really applied to me. But once the focus of my personality and drive had changed, I desired to find just a few special friends that I could be myself with and thus develop a transparent relationship.

Soon after that experience I found a friend. She was a lovely lady who told me in no uncertain terms that she did not need to be rescued. As a result, we developed a relationship based solely on honesty, trust . . . and eventually love. Lynnette became my best friend long before she became my wife. Through that relationship, I was able to become a friend to others without feeling the need to fix their lives. Some time later, I became acquainted with a couple of men, men who also didn’t need to be rescued. It was great. I found myself simply relaxing in their friendship. I could listen to them without the need to fix them. I could feel their emotions. Share in their joys. In doing that I became their friend.

When there was a tough issue to discuss or a behavior in their life that was moving them away from their relationship with Christ, I could talk to them about it and know that they would listen and evaluate a friend’s counsel. The verse became reality. From what I’ve learned here’s my advice.

Realize your worth as a child of God. Learn of His love for you and the grace He has given freely. Develop a deep relationship with the Lord through prayer and Bible study. Then, be a friend to someone. And let that relationship make you and your friend better.

Who Are You Influnencing?

Everyone of us can recall someone who was an impact on our lives.  It may have been a family member, teacher, or anyone with whom you had contact.  It could have been great or bad depending on the results.

This past weekend our new son-in-law to be came down with my daughter and the first thing they did when they sat down on the couch was to begin a conversation about the Lord.  I listened to Rusty when he told me a little about his past and that he had made the decision to have a relationship with God through His son.  OK, my heart was leaping for joy and I wanted to speak but did not.  Rusty then went on to say that he wanted me to baptize him.  Now I was honored and excited beyond words and thrilled for him and my daughter.  Part of not saying anything was to catch the tears of joy!

Like many of us we were raised to know right from wrong, but just not committed to doing things right..  Yet here is a big strong man who weeps at the excitement of a relationship with the Lord.  During the past year, I know my daughter has held to the foundations that she was taught years ago in church and in the family.  Rusty, Stephanie and the family found a church that is contemporary and meets their needs in developing relationships on several fronts.

So I give credit to Riverhills Christian Church, family, friends, and Stephanie for being an influence in Rusty's desire to always have a relationship with the Lord and know the excitement that his family has.  I am so proud of my daughter for standing on her training even during the roughest times of her life.  What is more exciting is that Rusty is already being an influence on others about a relationship with the Lord (as I heard in a conversation on the phone at lunch).   And it's only the beginning!

So who are you influencing?  It's not just what you say but how people see you in everyday situations.  Then again, who is influencing you?  I pray the biggest influence is the Creator of the Universe who is passionately in love with you and a God loving friend.

Trust me when I say that the results of your influence can be the most exciting part of your life or the saddest.

Which do you chose?

Why Get Involved?

Today I hear so many people say how rotten politics are.  Well is was not that many years ago (OK it was 36 years ago) that I remember our local politics where is was such a 'good ole' boy' network that many honest people were thrown under the bus.

Such was the case in our hometown.  I just got out of college and was living in my hometown.  Soon it was obvious that our local mayor and police chief were prime in suspicious activities.   So I was talking to a Councilman and complaining.  His words hit me right between the eyes.  "If you are going to just complain, go someplace else.  Otherwise if you are  going to complain here, try and do something about it."

I thought about it and said, "I need to try and quit complaining."  Even though I was quite young at the time, I set out to run for the office of Mayor.  That November we won all precincts and now I could try and shape a city in which people could be proud.

One of the distractions in the campaign was from Christians who said that we should NOT be be involved in politics.  My response was either we strive to turn the world (or our city) to the Lord and His guiding principles or we just find a camp and be a follower of Jim Jones of the People's Temple. I think I even used the ostrich with his head in the ground a few times.   I did not win too many friends with those comments but set out to bring organization and fairness to every aspect of the offices in the city. 

Even though at that time I was the youngest Mayor in the State of Ohio, (which some people said was a problem) I spent many waking hours focusing on improving lives in the area I could affect.  What about you?  No matter what your age, get involved in either standing up for what you know is right or getting in there to change what you can. 

What do you want to leave your children, grandchildren, and their friends in the community?  Your stuff may be gone but  it will be in the principles that are set from God's word that will last.  Shouldn't you consider getting involved?  Your community and your country is at stake.

Looking at Greatness

Psalms 48:1 Great is the Lord, and greatly to be praised in the city of our Lord, in the mountain of His holiness.

While flying into Chicago one night, our plane circled the downtown area on the approach to the airport. As we looked out the window everyone marveled at the lighted skyline. The Sears and Hancock towers loomed high above all the other buildings with their fine architecture and accented lighting. With our eyes focused on the splendor of light, someone commented as to how could man have conceived and built such great structures.

Reading Psalms 48 brought the greatness of “things” into a better perspective. We all look at new innovations in products, or look up to special people, as being great. But often we do not realize we are looking at “Greatness” everyday when, in fact, we really are.

When we see the brown grass and dead flowers in our yard and in the spring turning again into the beautiful colors or the caterpillar becoming a beautiful butterfly, we witness the “Greatness of God”. While looking at another sunrise or sunset, we see the “Greatness of God”.

You see, nature is one of God’s ways of showing His greatness and love to each one of us. Everywhere we look, there is evidence of our wonderful God and creator. The Lord is to be given the credit and praise, not man. The most spectacular way to see the greatness of God is in the compassion and love that comes from a relationship with His Son.

You can see that manifested today by just looking around. Look at people who are helping those in need. Or someone who is giving a listening ear to another’s problems. Then there are those single parents and other families that are working hard to make ends meet and still trying to put the Lord first in their household. They are truly proof of God’s grace and greatness.

As you look around today, be sure to praise the Lord for His greatness. By opening your eyes, you may, for the first time, see something special in the people you previously took for granted.

Maybe it’s because they understand the “Greatness of our God.”