If you are a small business person, you are probably familiar with the "Long No" when trying to get a business loan. The banks will entertain you and say they can loan you money and all you have to do is fill out endless amounts of paperwork. Then they ask for more information and take weeks on end to give you hope. Only after a month or so of this encouragement, the banker calls or just sends you a letter saying they can not loan you any money. One time a bank said we would be happy to loan you the money but you have to deposit the same amount you want to borrow in their bank. My one comment was, "If I had that amount of money to invest, why in the world would I be talking to you?"
Recently a friend was trying to get a loan for new hotel in our town. Banks song and danced him for months only to give him the answer above.
Yet today, I am having to embrace a long no that has been seven years in the making. In 2004 Lynnette said we would have to start a contemporary church like to one we left in Florida. My reaction was "No way" but in 2007 we found a 38,000 square foot building, that during our time of praying, the building became vacant. We found churches that desired to establish campuses and so we prayed harder. For seven years the building has remained empty and God kept the building secure and in great condition. Then in reading the Circle Maker, I began walking around the building each week. It would be two years in October of being faithful to pray while walking the building each week.
Then today I found out that the building is going to be occupied in the near future and will no longer be available. My heart sank and I cried out of disappointment. Going back to work has kept this heavy on my heart because I know of all the people in our area that need the Lord but will not drive 45 minutes to build a relationship with the Lord. My cry was, "Why Lord have you let me be filled with hope for seven years only to allow it to be taken away?"
With a crushed spirit, I can only say that I trust the Lord with all my heart and He must have something better in mind for us. Therefore I now struggle with,"What do I pray for?" My pain is not for a building but for the lives of 26,000 people in our area who want nothing to do with the Lord or church.
I could keep this all bottled up but I pray that in my transparency, the Lord will open a door for us to walk through and see life change here in our area. The hard part emotionally is to get a "no" after 364 weeks of praying for something.
